Suicide, (and having suicidal thoughts) is still one of the biggest taboos in the modern world we live in. It really doesn't have to be that way though.
Approximately 8 years ago, I found myself attending a free seminar in LA. The seminar organizers were offering free 3-nights lodging at a nice hotel for the attendees, so I took the offer, and I drove from Mojave Desert to the City of Angels.
Four thousand people attended this free event! Throughout the entire seminar, which lasted 3 long days, we were asked to take numerous breaks, so our brains could stay fresh (more receptive, of course, to what the organizers were selling). On those breaks, a loud music that was coming from the speakers was energizing the atmosphere. Not able to resist the rhythm, I jumped on the stage and I started to dance. Immediately, I was followed by the other attendees who started to dance on the stage around me. This was taking place on every single break. With a blissful smile on my face, and while moving my body freely, quickly I became sort of like a sensation.
Towards the end of the seminar, the host had asked if any of us would be willing to share on the stage something personal, perhaps something that we felt grateful for. I joined the line that formed around the microphone. When it was my turn, I took the microphone, and I told the four thousand people that were starting at me, that I felt grateful to be alive, -- that I have had survived despite that fact of having to be hospitalized several times for intentional overdose on sleeping pills. The crowd remained speechless for a while. Then people started to stand up and to applaud.
When I left the stage, I found myself immediately surrounded by numerous people. Everybody started handing me their business cards. People were trying to let me know how moved they were by me, and by what I've said. Some lady had even invited me to appear as a guest on a live TV show. Some movie producers shared their interest in making a movie based on my life and my story. All this experience was pretty amazing, but not nearly as amazing as what happened next.
In the midst of all this commotion, caused by the attention I was getting, I was pulled aside by a young girl. She had a look on her face as if she just saw a ghost. Her face was pale and she seemed unable to contain the excitement. Her words seemed to be leaving her vocal cords too slow to follow her aroused mind.
"Oh my god! Oh my god! I have to tell you something!" She kept talking while directing me towards the corner, in an attempt to hide both of us from the curiosity of others. When we finally reached some privacy, she told me few things about herself. She was 18 years old and she came to this seminar with her boyfriend to celebrate their last 3 days on this Earth. The young couple have been feeling depressed and hopeless for quite some time. Neither of them had a job and they were living here and there, on whoever's couch they were allowed to sleep on. Fed up with the world and the life they've been enduring, the two teenagers decided to end their lives together. They had decided that after the seminar they were going to jump of the bridge. They already picked the time and the place to do so. But since the seminar had offered free lodging, they decided to take the offer, and to enjoy their last days on this planet. And that's how our roads crossed...
"When you were dancing on that stage, I've been watching you and I've been hating you the whole time!" The girl continued explaining everything to me.
"I was so irritated by you. I was like, what a fucking bitch! Look at her, dancing all day long, all happy, and all that. If I was as beautiful as she is, I'd be dancing too! She's probably some spoiled, rich girl who never had to work in her entire life. If I had her life, I'd be jumping like that too. And then, you got up on the stage, and you said what you said. At that very moment when you finished talking, I suddenly saw a black energy, sort of like a black Soul or something, that was floating away from my, and my boyfriend's bodies! I'm not kidding you. Look at me, I still have goosebumps on my skin!" The young girl kept shaking while I kept staring at her completely speechless.
"And so then, I knew we weren't going to jump of that bridge. You've saved our lives! By being so honest, by sharing what you've shared you've literally saved two lives today. That's not even all. After that dark shade disappeared somewhere in the ceiling, I looked at your face. You were still standing on that stage but you didn't look the same anymore. Your face was glowing and you looked like an Angel. You didn't even look human to me! The energy around you was so beautiful, and you were soooo beautiful, that I can't even describe it! I just felt like I had to tell you all this."
This amazing experience had taught me that we can indeed help those who are feeling hopeless to the point of considering suicide. We can share openly our own heartaches, and by doing so we make others feel that they are not alone.